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Post by Mackenzie Aldridge on Aug 22, 2014 22:17:34 GMT -5
Mackenzie had to take a few steadying breaths and force herself to stop pacing her room before she went ahead and called Alyssa. Admittedly, listening to the other girl's voicemail had shaken her a bit the night before, and she knew this wasn't going to be an easy conversation. A good night of sleep, however, had helped her settle down some - though it definitely hadn't chased away the knowledge that she'd behaved like an idiot, and she definitely needed to try her best to make amends. She could only hope Alyssa would be willing to forgive her - she was willing to let the girl rant and yell at her for however long she wanted if she'd just ultimately take her apology. Obviously, she had to apologize to her Aunt and Uncle as well for worrying them and everything else, but she figured she should still start with her best friend. After a few more minutes of deep breathing, she finally went ahead and picked up her cell phone, trying to keep herself calm as she pressed the speed dial for Alyssa's cell phone. Sitting down on the edge of her bed and lightly chewing on her bottom lip as she waited for the other girl to pick up.
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Post by Alyssa Travers on Aug 24, 2014 10:14:48 GMT -5
Alyssa had woken up in a good mood for all of about ten seconds until she'd remembered the day before and then that good mood had gone straight to Hell. She was pissed at Mackenzie still. How dare she not even call her back after leaving unannounced. Declan had pointed out that technically she had said that she was leaving and she'd just misinterpreted it, but that hadn't exactly gotten him anywhere good so he'd kept his mouth shut about the fight after that and instead had just tried to get her to focus on other things. That seemed to be the tactic this morning as well as she asked if there were any cool things that they should do today in Chicago, which she'd started to answer until she remembered that the things she was listing off were things she normally did with Mackenzie and then she got angry all over again. Glancing at her phone when she heard it start ringing. As she noticed Kenzie's name on the screen her glare darkened slightly, but she reached for the phone and headed away from the kitchen where she'd been standing. "Oh, so you finally found time to return my call now?" she snapped sarcastically in place of a proper greeting.
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Post by Mackenzie Aldridge on Aug 24, 2014 19:53:10 GMT -5
Mackenzie definitely didn't feel all that brave as she held her phone up, her breathing feeling a tad shaky as she had to keep herself from fidgeting or biting her lip raw. Her heart beat didn't even feel right at this point, but in spite of it all, hearing the other girl's voice as she picked up the phone - although it had a snappy tone to it that'd never been used toward her before - made her stomach feel a bit fuzzy. "Alyssa..." she began, her voice sounding small even to her ears, but she knew she couldn't just dismiss what she had to say now. "I'm sorry. I'm really, honestly sorry. I know, I acted like a complete idiot, and my leaving was not only rude, it was immature, unfair and mean," she went on, taking a deep breath to try and settle down her heart. "I didn't act like a best friend, I know that, and I really am sorry for it. I just..." she spoke, catching herself before she could say anything more that may give the other girl any hint of her feelings at this point. "I can't even say how sorry I am, truly. I'm embarrassed and I'm ashamed of myself, trust me," she added, bracing herself as she finished off for what the other girl might have to say next. She was definitely hopeful that her best friend would forgive her - but she had no doubt that even if she did, it wouldn't be without saying anything first.
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Post by Alyssa Travers on Aug 25, 2014 11:42:24 GMT -5
Possibly it was unfair for Alyssa to snap at Mackenzie as soon as she answered the phone, but she honestly didn't care right now. The other girl deserved it after running out on her, fighting with her, and ignoring her texts and calls. Noting the sound of her voice when she spoke her name was off, but pushing aside the mild concern she felt easily as the anger still greatly overshadowed everything else. Listening to her apologize, she almost felt better, nodding in agreement as she listed off what her leaving was and that she hadn't acted like a best friend. Still, her apology didn't make everything better, it didn't explain anything in the slightest. "Okay that's great, you're sorry. Really, that makes it all better. Except it doesn't, Mackenzie." Flares of the annoyance she felt creeping into her words. "You left! You left without saying anything - or you did say something but just assumed that I thought you meant that you'd actually leave?! Why would I have thought that in a million years! You were just arguing with me that we didn't have enough time together and then you cut that time two weeks short because... what? You were upset? Because we got into one stupid argument? Why would you leave, Mackenzie?"
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Post by Mackenzie Aldridge on Aug 25, 2014 12:21:37 GMT -5
Mackenzie was pretty much holding her breath as she waited for Alyssa to respond, and the mere tone of her voice as she started speaking was enough to let it out in a sharp breath, because she could already tell this conversation would not go over well. To be fair, she hadn't expected her best friend to just take one mere apology from her and call it good, she'd known she'd want to take her anger out on her, and Kenzie wasn't begrudging of that - she did feel like she deserved it. Besides, although she'd never been on the receiving end of it, she wasn't a stranger to the other girl's temper. She just wouldn't have ever expected to be the one whom it was directed at, ever. Or well, maybe it was unreasonable to expect a lifetime's friendship to never be tarnished by a single fight. "I didn't... it wasn't the fight, it's just... I can't explain," she spoke, shutting her eyes tightly as she pinched the bridge of her nose. She knew this wouldn't go over well, but there really wasn't anything she could say. She wasn't a good liar, and Alyssa would know right away if she wasn't telling the truth - but the truth wasn't something she could tell. "It's complicated and it's just... I'm sorry Alyssa, please, I really am," she spoke, her voice a tad shaky though she took in a deep breath to try and steady it. She'd been ready for her best friend's anger, but she'd never really considered the possibility that she may not be able to forgive her - and for the first time, she was starting to fear it.
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Post by Alyssa Travers on Aug 25, 2014 18:38:47 GMT -5
Not being able to understand why Mackenzie had left made Alyssa more than angry, it made her feel hurt. Like the girl was running away from her just because they'd had a fight, but she was definitely masking any hurt with anger right now because Mackenzie deserved it. They were best friends, they didn't ditch each other, plain and simple. Especially to leave without explanation was a deep betrayal and she needed one to accept Mackenzie's apology. Sucking in a sharp breath as Mackenzie spoke, first not seeming to say anything before adding that she couldn't explain. She couldn't what? Another pang of hurt stabbed at her, but the anger was more ready and stronger even as she said that she was sorry. "You're sorry but you can't explain?" she repeated, her voice a bit higher and tighter. "What the hell is that? No. You argue with me over nothing. You run out on the time we get to spend together. You make everyone worry - including me! - And all I get as an explanation from my best friend about what's going on is 'it's complicated' and 'I can't explain'? Bullshit, Mackenzie! That's bullshit and you know it! Now you don't trust me enough to even tell me what's really going on here? I don't deserve a real explanation?"
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Post by Mackenzie Aldridge on Aug 25, 2014 19:26:49 GMT -5
Mackenzie could already tell, as she heard the sharp intake of breath on the other end of the line, that Alyssa wasn't going to take what she'd just told her in a good light. She should have expected it, really, but she'd still been crazy enough to hope her best friend might just be able to forgive her without knowing what had been going on in her mind. Having just come to the realization of the feelings she had for the other girl though, and considering the fact that she was already happy in her own loving relationship, Kenzie just couldn't speak out those words to her. She couldn't. Each word the other girl spoke in return making her feel more and more breathless as she bit harder on her bottom lip to keep herself from crying. She'd been emotional enough the day before, right now wasn't a time for letting go again. Besides, she felt like at this point, Alyssa would be even more annoyed at her if she started crying when she was the one who'd acted like a jerk. "Of course I trust you, you know more about me than anybody else does," she told her, her breath hitching slightly as she tried to keep her fingers from shaking. "But I just, I can't say, I don't even know... it's so... I can't explain right now, I just can't. Maybe in time I'll be able to, but right now it's not... I can't," she spoke, her voice breaking slightly on the last word as she kept her eyes shut and hoped the other girl would be able to give her a bit more time.
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Post by Alyssa Travers on Aug 25, 2014 22:16:12 GMT -5
Alyssa couldn't even believe Mackenzie right now. They'd always told each other everything since they were young. She'd told the girl every milestone in her life and she'd been sure that the other girl had always done the same with her. Hell, she was the first person that Mackenzie had come out to and she'd known that that had been a really difficult thing for her. And now there was something even bigger than that - apparently - that had to do with her and she wouldn't tell her. How could she do this to her? She huffed when Mackenzie added that she knew more about her than anyone else did, because apparently even that wasn't enough for whatever she was keeping from her. Shaking her head as she went on to continue to say that she couldn't tell her, that maybe in time she'd be able to but right now she couldn't. It was all stupid. She didn't want to tell her, didn't believe that she owed her an explanation for running out on her and for effectively ruining part of the summer. "And I can't call you my best friend if you don't act like it. So why don't you call me when you decide I'm worthy of knowing what's really going on with you," she shot back, her own voice breaking on worthy before she hung up. Running upstairs to her bedroom and slamming the door shut behind her.
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Post by Mackenzie Aldridge on Aug 26, 2014 10:36:33 GMT -5
Kenzie wasn't used to all the emotional mess that was going on inside of her right now. She didn't usually get this way, act like this either. She definitely regretted her actions of the day prior, and wished she'd never actually left, but had just taken the time to cool down a little instead. She couldn't change the past though - it was done, and that was all there was to it. All she could do now was apologize - but apparently, that wasn't enough for her best friend. She needed more than an apology, she needed to understand, and although Mackenzie knew that was fair, she couldn't give that to her. At this point, it wasn't even a matter of wanting to - she just wasn't capable of doing it. She couldn't push those words out of her mouth, she just couldn't. Hearing Alyssa's next words, she had to swallow a small sob as she went on, practically choking on air at this point. "Alyssa," she pleaded, too late as the other girl hung up on her. Her head and heart aching as she put her phone down on her bed, trying to get herself to take deep breaths in spite of the fact that each she drew in got increasingly shorter, sliding off the edge of her bed and onto the floor as she wrapped her arms around her knees to make herself as small as possible, tears soon flowing, her breathing out of control. Calling Aunt Felicia and Uncle Nate would have to wait a little.
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